It’s ass o’clock in the morning, and I’m stumbling around my yard in boxers, desperately trying to remember if I turned off the sprinkler before passing out last night. Spoiler alert: I didn’t.

As I squelched through my newly formed swamp, I realized something had to change.

After a little research, I found this RAINPOINT Water Timer, a little gizmo promising to water my lawn without requiring me to stay conscious or wear pants. But could this plastic overlord really save my grass (and dignity)?

Here’s what happened.

Update:

BEST PRICE on the RAINPOINT Water Timer here:

https://amzn.to/4cHLoyi

First Impressions

The first thing that caught my eye was the display. It’s a 2.5″ LED affair that’s easier to read than my ex’s “It’s not you, it’s me” text. I mean, you could probably see this thing from space. Or at least from your neighbor’s yard while they judge your gardening skills.

As I fondled the device (don’t judge, we all have our hobbies), I noticed the control knob. It had a satisfying click to it, like it was saying “Yeah, I’m not gonna let some bird screw up your watering schedule.” Take that, previous timer that couldn’t handle a pigeon’s butt.

Now, the ports. This bad boy has two of them, ready to unleash a torrent of H2O on your thirsty plants. It’s like having two bartenders at an open bar – double the hydration, double the fun.

My initial thought? “This thing better work, or I’m gonna look real stupid talking to a plastic box in my yard.” But I gotta admit, there was a glimmer of hope. Maybe, just maybe, this could be the answer to my “I want a nice lawn but I also want to sit on my ass” dilemma.

One thing was for sure – setting this up was going to be a hell of a lot more interesting than my usual Saturday night of binge-watching obscure documentaries. Bring it on, RAINPOINT. Let’s see if you can make this brown-thumbed disaster into the envy of the cul-de-sac.

Key Features

Dual-Zones: This timer’s got two zones, like a mullet – business in the front, party in the back. You can set different schedules for each zone, which is perfect if you’ve got a Jekyll and Hyde yard situation going on. Delicate flowers on one side, hardy weeds masquerading as a lawn on the other? No problem.

38 Watering Frequencies: Thirty-eight. That’s not a typo. This timer has more scheduling options than I have excuses for not going to the gym. You can water every hour, every day, or even every week if you’re going for that “abandoned lot” aesthetic.

Manual Override for Control Freaks: Sometimes, you just need to take matters into your own hands. Maybe there’s a heat wave, or maybe you just want to feel like you’re actually doing something in the garden. The RAINPOINT’s got three manual modes. It’s like having a “boss mode” button for your yard.

Rain Delay for Mother Nature’s Moods: Ever set up your sprinklers only to have Mother Nature laugh in your face with an impromptu downpour? The RAINPOINT’s got a rain delay function that can pause your watering for up to 72 hours. Very nice.

Tough as Nails (or at least as tough as high-impact plastic): This timer isn’t some delicate flower. It’s built to withstand up to 35kg of water pressure, which is more than my emotional pressure tolerance on a good day. Plus, it’s got a self-cleaning valve that’s supposed to last for 600,000 uses. That’s enough to water your lawn well into the apocalypse.

Pros

Idiot-Proof Programming: Let’s face it, I struggle to program a microwave, let alone a sophisticated watering system. But the RAINPOINT Timer is so user-friendly, it’s like it was designed for people who still use their fingers to count.
Battery Life: This little powerhouse runs on AA batteries, but don’t let that fool you. It sips power like a teetotaler at an open bar. You could probably hand this timer down to your grandkids before needing to change the batteries.
Built Tougher Than My New Year’s Resolutions: Unlike my commitment to that gym membership, this timer is in it for the long haul. It’s weatherproof, shockproof, and probably teenage-proof (though I don’t recommend testing that last one). You could probably run over it with your lawnmower and it’d still keep ticking. It’s the cockroach of garden equipment – and I mean that in the best possible way.
Saves Water: By delivering water exactly when and where it’s needed, you’re not just preventing your grass from turning into a crunchy brown mess – you’re also not flushing money down the drain. It’s like having a tiny, eco-friendly accountant living in your garden hose.

Cons

The Price Tag Might Make You Wince: If you’re used to those basic twist timers, the price might make you feel like you’re buying a small car instead of a garden gadget.
The Display: While the LED display is readable from space (slight exaggeration), it might also serve as a nightlight for your entire neighborhood. If you’re into stealth gardening, this might not be your jam. On the bright side (pun intended), you’ll never lose it in the dark.
It’s Not Psychic (Yet): Despite its fancy features, it can’t read your mind or predict the weather. You still need to put in some effort to set it up properly. If you were hoping for a completely hands-off experience, you might be slightly disappointed. But let’s be real – if you want zero involvement, just pave over your lawn and be done with it.

Final Thoughts

If you’re the type who gets a thrill from manually adjusting sprinkler heads at 5 AM, or if you think “smart home” means your house graduated college, this might be overkill for you.

I’d say the ideal user is the lazy perfectionist. The person who wants a magazine-worthy yard without the magazine-worthy effort. It’s for the homeowner who’s tired of being the laughingstock of the neighborhood because their lawn looks like a recreation of the Sahara.

Best Price On the RAINPOINT Water Timer:

I’ve found you the current best deal on the RAINPOINT Water Timer, so be sure to follow the link below so you don’t get gouged paying full retail: